Wednesday, 3 November 2010
Out of Time
"How Do I Love Thee, Let Me Count The Ways"...Who would have thought that the end of Summertime would bring Elizabeth Barrett Browning's sonnet to mind?
I woke up last Sunday morning and I was confronted by a world in turmoil. Clocks to the right of me, clocks to the left of me and all wrong. "Let Me Count How Many"....First check the mobiles, mine and the missus's: their clever software would have worked out that we're now on GMT. Nope, so they needed changing. What about the DAB radio clock, surely that's OK the Beeb would make sure the radio was in tune - otherwise I (and the rest of Radio 4's drowsy audience) would have awoken to the Sunday Service !!!
The clock on the mantle piece in the bedroom can be ignored since it fell silent a year ago when the battery ran out. Which is also the case with my "Ben Sherman" watch I had worn after my Rotary watch stopped. My free watch from Orange, which I received when I bought my last but two mobiles (need to check their times, when I have a moment - they're somewhere) still works but since it's a fashion disaster, all white with a big plastic strap I can't wear, I don't bother to correct.
The computers are fine. They have switched to GMT automatically, although if I remember correctly under Windows 95 you had to change the time manually. Phone up TIM and Bill Gates. In the bathroom the DAB radio there has obediently jumped into a wormhole and emerged an hour earlier, but the bathroom clock needs attending to.
Making my way downstairs and into the kitchen, the cooker, micro-wave, boiler and wall clock are smiling in anticipation of having their bits tickled so they can "Step Back in Time". The answer phone needs attending to as does the carriage clock in the dining room, but the TV set box is connected to the great Time Lord in the Sky so that can be ignored. As can the Waterford carriage clock which I received for working for 25 years, uncomplaining, in the Civil Service. I actually received it after 34 years due to an administrative oversight. The battery has gone flat.
And that was it. Room by room I'd brought the house back in line with GMT. Except the cats who couldn't understand why I was insisting on feeding them an hour earlier.
What's that? A white rabbit?