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Monday, 28 June 2010

The End of the World

I didn't sleep at all well last night. It was nothing to do with a certain game of football or an over-large intake of alcohol or even the hot steamy night. The blame lies fairly and squarely at the door of Armageddon Online - assuming it hasn't been blown in by some catastrophic event.

Americans - don't they just kill you. As if we haven't enough to worry about , they host a website that glories in scaring the shite out out of you. The home page greeting is "Armegaddon Online - your source for disaster news and end of world scenarios." They can't be serious -can they? There's nothing on the site that I could find to show whether these people are nutters or simply having fun.

All that is cataclysmic is catered for. Whatever your taste you'll find it on AO. I'm a bit partial to space disasters so it was great to learn  there’s a remote, but extremely terrifying possibility that our planet is about to be swallowed from within by a man-made black hole . In fact, our planet could be booby trapped with baby black holes already.

Unfortunately the article gives no further information which I find rather disappointing. I would have like to have learnt how to avoid a baby black hole - wouldn't you? I'd be rather miffed to step out of my front door one summer's morning to find myself crushed into nothingness without having the chance to kiss the wife "Goobye".

If I was living in the Mid West of the USA, and I was of a nervous disposition, AO's article on the supervolcano lurking in Yellowstone Park would have me in my Winnebago in a jiffy heading as  far away from the area as possible. The trouble is I could be heading into more trouble whether I went east,west, north or south.

The eastern seaboard is due for a major disaster according to AO. On the other side of the Atlantic, a large part of one of the Canary Islands is just waiting for the local volcano to erupt sending it into the sea and triggering a large tsunami which will rush across  the pond, inundating much of the east coast washing away major towns and cities and drowning millions.

Heading west you'll run into another major tsunami. Just west of the Oregon coast lies the Cascadia subduction zone where the Juan de Fuca Plate is moving under the North American Plate. A major earthquake here could displace enough water to cause a massive tidal wave to impact along the west coast.

What about heading south? Don't bother thinking about it. If you don't get bogged down in tar and oil from the continuing man-made disaster in the Gulf, there's evidence that the huge store of methane gas, which is trapped under the sediment of the Gulf, might escape. If it does, the slightest flame or spark would ignite the stuff - think a trillion bar-barques fired up at once. Not a happy thought.

North to Alaska! You must be joking: are you suicidal or something? Earlier this year a leading scientist revealed that Europe could be just five years away from the start of a new Ice Age. OK, he reckons Europe will be affected with a freeze so complete that people will be able to walk from England to Ireland or across the North Sea from Scotland to northern Europe. But I wouldn't bank on Canada or Alaska missing out on the fun.

All in all, if you're anywhere in the States I suggest you stay put and build up your survival rations. And there AO can help out also. Survival Acres will supply all your "End of Days" needs be it for a week, a month, year or even 10 years. Frankly I'd be really pissed off if, having bought in 10 years' supply of survival foods, the world ended in a nano second.

I'm glad I didn't log onto the "How To Survive 2012" website before I went to bed last night. Not because of the final disaster that's predicted there -  after all, if it happens, it'll save us the embarrassment of hosting the 2012 Olympics - but because of the "Beings Who Call Themselves the Mayan Day Keepers". And, of course, you'll need to know "How To Survive Polar Shift at Dec 2012: safe zones of our planet – United States" 

There are people out there who are deadly serious about all this. It's enough to make you wonder if you can sleep safe in your bed at night! 

3 comments:

The Chick said...

So your saying I should relocate to London? I'll on the East Coast and I can swim, so maybe I'll make it :)

Barry Coidan said...

Dear Chick, I'd love you to move to London except you'd be no safer here than on the Eastern seaboard.

The Sagittarian said...

Crieky, let's hope the people who edit that website don't know about us down here...(well, my WV is 'hexugly' so I HAD to leave a comment no matter how piffly!)